A decision to leave the Orthodox community is frequently portrayed as a painful and heroic act. But leaving rarely works this way.

Both the secular world and the Orthodox community have narratives about what it means to leave Orthodox Judaism. How does someone who actually leaves relate to these narratives?

There’s a widespread notion that people who leave Orthodox communities are shunned, completely cut off by family. It’s not true — but what really happens may not be less painful.

Why do people who have no connection to Orthodox Judaism find 'exit stories' so interesting, and why does telling the story feel false even when it’s completely true?