Dear Editor,
I read a comment on Matzav that really triggered me. It said that “The main tachlis of a woman is to be a mashgiach over husband. That is her tafkid.”
The person when on to say, perhaps sarcastically, that the wife’s job is “to constantly badger him regarding his davening, learning, child rearing, kibbud av, flower buying, shmiras eynayim, finishing Shas with all Rishonim, shuckeling in shul like the rov, no relaxing on the couch at the end of a day, etc. It’s the wife’s job to change her husband and turn him into a Rabi Akiva Eiger. That is the only way to have true shalom bayis.”
This got me wondering: Why is it that many wives do view their position that way? And why don’t husbands serve as their wives’ mashgiach in the same way?
From my vantage point, I don’t see men breathing down their wives’ backs about lashon hara, about tznius, about shemiras hamitzvos, and so on and so forth.
But the wives seem to be forever rebuking their husbands for everything under the sun. What is gained by this? And what good is that for shalom bayis? Is that what is taught in seminary? Isn’t a marriage supposed to be a partnership, not a mashgicha  constantly criticizing her spouse?
Troubled in Brooklyn
{Matzav.com}