Harav Yaakov Bender, Rosh HaYeshiva of Yeshiva Darchei Torah in Far Rockaway, issued a heartfelt letter to parents of his yeshiva addressing the increasingly troubling trend of boys collecting money on Purim for extravagant prizes, associated with organizations they know little about.
Rav Bender begins his letter by acknowledging the widespread tradition of children collecting for charitable causes during Purim, a practice he has long encouraged in his Yeshiva. “Every Purim, many children of all stripes and ages come to our home. The boys are often collecting for some cause or another, and I am more than happy to give them $5 or $10 each, aside from some of the major campaigns,” he writes.
He reflects on how, in previous years, his Yeshiva students would feel the pain of others and raise funds to alleviate the burdens of their fellow Yidden. “One of those ways is to raise money for the indigent and poor,” Rav Bender explains. “I felt honored to be part of a Yeshiva where hundreds of talmidim are out there every Purim helping others. Not only that, but the children themselves felt good to help others.”
However, this year, Rav Bender was shocked by the nature of some of the collections. “Lo and behold, this year, more boys visited than ever, despite the short day. As always, I asked them for whom they were collecting. Many of the children answered with the names of an organization with which I was not familiar. I asked the children what the organization does; not a single child knew.”
Things took a more alarming turn when Rav Bender’s child brought home glossy booklets from one of these organizations. “I was stunned. Basically, children were promised prizes worth nearly 45% of the amount collected, or even more!” he writes.
Rav Bender then contrasts these new incentives with the more modest prizes of the past. “For many decades, Klal Yisroel has incentivized children to collect, but the prizes were minimal—to thank them for their work. I remember, as a little child, being asked to collect for Chinuch Atzmai. Sure, we ultimately got a prize—but Chinuch Atzmai representatives went around to all the classes explaining what the organization did. We felt part of a sacred mission: to help Klal Yisroel build Torah in Eretz Yisroel.”
He also references his own Yeshiva’s fundraising efforts, noting that they offer small incentive prizes for their annual Bike-a-thon campaign, which cost only a small fraction of the amount collected. “In terms of our Yeshiva, every spring, as part of our highly successful Bike-a-thon campaign, we include incentive prizes that cost a small fraction of the amount collected.”
The letter continues with an incredulous tone as Rav Bender details the kinds of prizes being offered. “It seemed that these children were in essence collecting for themselves—e.g., if a child collected $650, he would receive a beautiful, expensive, electric scooter.” He further questions the wisdom of such prizes, saying, “Agav, why would any parent allow their child to drive an electric, high-speed scooter? It is beyond my understanding.”
Rav Bender strongly condemns the nature of these new collections, calling them “terrible types of collections.” He adds, “To me, such an organization seems fishy.”
Importantly, Rav Bender makes it clear that his message is not against children collecting for worthy causes, but rather against the increasingly self-serving nature of these campaigns. “I want to emphasize that this is not an ‘anti-kids-collecting’ message. On the contrary, how great it is to instill the proper chinuch in children, to walk outside their own daled amos, raising funds to help others!”
Rav Bender reflects on the values instilled in the students of his Yeshiva, citing how his older students dedicate their time selflessly to raise over half a million dollars annually for individuals in real need. “Our older bachurim gave away their Purim, once again, to raise over half a million dollars for total strangers, local families and individuals in real need—all without one penny of incentives. Ashreihem.”
He concludes his letter with a call to action for parents and educators to avoid fostering greed in children. “Our job as parents and mechanchim is to imbue middos tovos; not to teach our children to be greedy and busy with themselves.”
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